Changes

Living life with a life threatening disease feels like your engaged in a battle. In my minds eye I can see the enemy. The enemy are round cells that group together like dead grapes. Before I receive the test result with the bad news. I never think about the cells in my body. Never, and than I go about my business.

Lets name the strategies to win the battle necessary to beat the cancer cells into oblivion. Nuke them with RADIATION, remove them with SURGERY, just take a PILL or poison them with CHEMOTHERAPY. To name the most common medical procedures.

My personal favorite way to kill the enemy is PRAYER. Always, and then I go about my business.

It has been a bittersweet week. The best news is the birth of Luke and Willow. Hurray. The bad news is Bob had surgery to remove Cancerous lymph nodes in his face. Janet was hospitalized with PNEUMONIA. Bubba a kind and sweet soul passed away from a massive heart attack. I mourn his loss from the bottom of my heart.

Change happens every day, the consequences we label bad or we label good. After all the bad that happened this week I find it hard to digest bad news I received from my MRI result? I am praying for my friends and family. I guess adding myself to the prayer list is my only recourse because tears do not CHANGE anything.

PEACE

What I Love

What I crave is for people to not to feel sorry for me. I feel this way because the cancer has fractured my spine as well as my psyce. All I want is to keep living with goals and dreams. I love life, and I love my family. I am lucky to have friends that help me with everday tasks. Sometimes life is a double edged sword. PEACE

Family

Family

Several months ago we lost the patriarch of our family. He was a successful man who worked hard and achieved the American dream. He had a dry sense of humor, and a was a role model to all that knew him. He was my fathers oldest brother, and we loved him very much. I pray my uncle and my father meet in heaven. Along with all my families lost souls.

I am not including real names. Privacy?

Yesterday, my family from out of town, got together to celebrate my uncles life. He passed away after suffering with health problems for years. It was a fantastic event. Afterwards, I knew I would like to spend more time with everyone there. I am praying the next event will be a wedding.

How to relax

How hard is it to relax? It all depends on certain factors? If you are worried about your health, money, relationships, keeping up with the Kardashians. Relaxing can be difficult. Letting go of your problems is a sure way to relax.

This week I have found my relaxing chai. My Mom picked me up, and we drove two hours out of town. We landed at a beach. Thanks to my Aunt we have comfortable accomodations. My cousin met us at the timeshare and gave us permission to “do anything we wanted to do” I found these words sufficient enough to let go of all my worries and RELAX!

I pray everyone can relax! Your body needs it to stay healthy, and so does your emotional health. May the sun and the stars shine on you!

PEACE

Alive

I have not kept up my blog. Excuses…excuses…excuses. I have changed cancer pills, made it through chemo shots in my spine, cyberknife in L 4, PET scan this week . Praying for a summer where I can spend lots of time with my family, especially, my Grandson. Other than that I am determined to finish two novels. My son made a statement that hit home. Mom you have been writing for years and haven’t published anything. I have not even tried to publish my prose. Mostly due to procrastination. I hope everyone that is suffering from cancer peace from pain and isolation. I pray the family and friends of the victimes of disease the energy and passion to include those less fortunate in your lives. Life is about how far your arms can surround the amount of love you show to others. Peace

2019 Reading List January

The Art of Peace by Morihei Ueshiba. Translated by John Stevens SHAMBALA, BOULDER 1997.

YOGA 365 Daily Wisdom For Life On and Off The Mat. Susan and Harwood Ruebin. CHRONICAL BOOKS, San Franscico, 1997.

Meditation From The Road, The Road Less Traveled. Daily Reflections From The Road Less Traveled, and the Different Drum. M. Scott Peck, M.D. A TOUCHTONE BOOK. Published by, Simon & Schuster NEW YORK LONDON TORONTO SYDNEY TOYKO SINGAPORE